My Christmas Tree

I don’t have a lot of holiday decorations. [There are a lot of things that could go in the blank of the sentence “I don’t have a lot of ____________”, mostly becuase I don’t have a lot of space .]I told myself this year that I couldn’t put anything out until I cleaned up a little, which is exactly what I did on the snow day.

When I lived in New Bedford my cousin sent me a little tree that lights up and that has been the centerpiece of any holiday decor for the last 5 years. Last year as I was plugging it in a fuse blew and it stopped lighting up. I had some unresolved anxiety that day because I flipped out, crying in the kitchen about not even being able to keep a fake, foot-tall tree, with the end point of my tearful musings being the usual one: dying alone.

I kept the tree in the box of seasonal stuff and took it out again Friday, finding a bag with replacement fuses and bulbs. I replaced the fuses, jiggled all the bulbs in their sockets, and plugged it in again. Nothing.

When I walked into my kitchen this morning it was lit. I don’t know why it started working now, but I’m not looking this gift horse in the mouth. It’s a Christmas miracle.

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